June 03, 2003

Begin: 10:15PM

Begin: 10:15PM

last cigarette: Never, thank God...
last kiss: Couple of months...
last good cry: About a month ago, I think, around the end of school
last library book checked out: probably a play by Neil Simon
last movie seen: "The Andromeda Strain" on AMC on Sunday
last book read: "All in the Timing" by David Ides (alright, they're plays, but hell...last book I've been reading is "Atlas Shrugged," although I haven't finished it yet.)
last cuss word uttered: F$%^, during theater work today
last beverage drank: lemonade
last food consumed: Cheesesteak from D'Alasandros
last crush: Oh geez...do they have to know? :)
last phone call: to my parents at home tonight
last tv show watched: Law & Order tonight
last time showered: this morning at like 7:45AM
last shoes worn: Black sneakers
last cd played: "Rush of Blood to the Head," Coldplay
last item bought: soap at the bookstore
last thing downloaded: some Rolling Stones songs that Brian's party reminded me of...(Mother's Little Helper, Wild Horses, Let's Spend the Night Together)
last annoyance: The director of the play we're working for this week who demands Broadway out of her 4th, 5th, 6th, 7th, and 8th grade students
last disappointment: not being able to leave work at 4pm like I hoped...
last soda drank: Cherry Coke, from the machine in the community center
last thing written: Housing Contract for next year :) (or a short story for Cronin...the toll collector one, can't remember the title.)
last key used: VA63 to lock the theater today
last word spoken: "John" (as in "Good night, John")
last sleep: Last night...too short.
last sexual fantasy: No one really needs to know this.
last weird encounter: hmmm...tied between running into Mike Imperato at my freind's grad party Saturday, or meeting up with the honors people at 1am in the townhouses afterwards while slightly drunk.
last ice cream eaten: Cookies and Cream
last time amused: today with Jas and Angie
last time wanting to die: In the cats, writing cues for the show today
last time in love: I don't think I've ever been in a state where I've ever not been in love...in that I am in love with something or someone pretty consistently no matter what.
last time hugged: Aymee and Margaret on Saturday night
last time scolded: today, same darn director
last time resentful: Today
last chair sat in: here, now.
last lipstick used: never
last underwear worn: clean
last bra worn: never
last shirt worn: Polo shirt, black (yeah, how strange of me to wear a polo shirt)
last time dancing: Masque Formal
last poster looked at: My Monet posters in my room.
last show attended: a movie, "A Mighty Wind" the night of my accident
last webpage visited: Slashdot, yes, I am a nerd.
1 MINUTE AGO: making my bed
1 HOUR AGO: watching Law and Order
1 DAY AGO: Sitting outside Angie's talking with her and Jas
1 WEEK AGO: Working in the theater on last week's group
1 YEAR AGO: Day One training on 6/3/02
I HURT: when I hurt people by saying something that I know I don't mean but I can't figure out why I said it.
I LOVE: sitting in the theater with Jas and Angie cracking jokes and making the job bearable.
I HATE: writer's block, cold weather like this that keeps me inside
I FEAR: rejection, loneliness, driving people away
I HOPE: for everything
I FEEL: tired, but happy.
I HIDE: I think my true self and my true opinions...something I'm working on
I DRIVE: 1997 Toyota Corolla
I MISS: people on campus
I LEARNED: Trying to repeat the past is futile, nothing can ever be as it was.
I NEED: love, sleep, friends around me
I THINK: I wonder what people will think of these answers.
current music: Bruce Springsteen
current taste: Nothing
current hair: bushy, perhaps a cut this weekend
current annoyance: the group here this week in the theater
current smell: whatever my room smells like
current thing i should be doing: sleeping, running
current desktop picture: none, just black...I need to find something
current refreshment: nothing
current worry: who's going to read this
1. What do you most like about your body?: a lot...its gotten me through a lot despite me treating it like crap a lot.
2. And least: 1) weight, 2) my left ankle which I sprained once and has never healed correctly, so its a pain to walk on sometimes...wants to sprain itself.
3. How many fillings do you have?: three, I believe
4. Do you think you're good looking?: I guess, I hope....
5. Do other people often tell you that you're good looking?: No one recently...
6. Do you look like any celebrities?: If I shave my head, Drew Carey. If I put a hat on, Michael Moore

Done at 10:39 - I copied it from Scott.

So there we go...I know, finally an update.

The last week has been hectic. I show up for work in the theater at 8am, and most days don't get off until 6pm. Yesterday, I finally saw "Noises Off" with Angie and Jas. It has to be one of the funniest movies I've ever seen...I went out and ordered the book last night from Samuel French, just to be able to remember it as it was. It was just a really nice, enjoyable night out with two friends. Doing that was the major reason to stay in Philadelphia - to just be able to go out after work and enjoy some time with friends.

Did you ever get a feeling of deep rememberance and longing for the past when you're in a moment that you see something or someone who reminds you of your past? Its a vague question, but I had vivid moments remembering times exactly like last night in high school...and I just felt like I could almost go back, or like I wanted to go back, or something...I think it was just a recognition of feeling completely comfortable with some people, and just wanting to fall into that moment forever.

Saturday was Brian Veitz's graduation party. Good times all around, glad to have gone. I stayed until it ended at like 12:30am. It was just a really nice time despite the weather - sitting under a tent in the backyard drinking and talking with friends. Its going to be weird not having Brian here...he was probably the person I was closest to. We always did dinner together when no one else was around. Not sure whats going to happen now, although theres talk of having Veitz fan club dinners with Fala, Julie, Vicki, Finnegan and stuff...I'm really going to miss the guy.

Theater work this work is going smoothly, even if its not as fun as last week. Eight AM mornings are killing me; I have to get to bed earlier.

I've finally decided that I'm going to try and reinvent myself in the areas that I want to change over the summer - drop a couple of pounds and get in shape, try to become more assertive, and become more more expressive and open with some things. I'm not hoping or expecting anything drastic, but why not? Theres nothing but time and opportunity here now. The blogging will continue, don't worry...


Posted by Matthew at June 3, 2003 10:56 PM
Comments

How touching. You are the man...and if you are the man...can I be your woman...or is that just wrong? Yeah, I'm thinking about that right now, that's just wrong. Wrong like going the wrong way down a one way street. Wrong like J.H.C.Dub. Wrong like going out with a girl and finding out she's a lesbian(or bi-sexual), and not feeling bad about her cheating on you with a girl. Wrong like...well, you fill in the blank.

Posted by: Brian P. Veitz on June 4, 2003 08:31 PM

Do you mean "Backwards Down a One-Way Street", Mr. Veatez? Just checking...

Posted by: Rod Roddy, TPIR on June 5, 2003 01:06 PM

All in the timing is ABSOLUTELY fantastic... I've seen 90% of the plays in that book done on stage, and been in two. They are so much fun!
Rock on with the David Ives :-D

Posted by: Ali on June 6, 2003 01:41 PM

Hey everybody. I just want to chime in here about Mister Veatez I believe it is. That poem, "Backwards Down a One Way Street" is fantastic, and you should not be making fun of him. He wrote that during his gawky awkward teenage years. Give him a break. Alright? Got it!? I'm talking to you Rod Roddy! I know where you work. Studio 6A? Yeah. That's right, I know where the Price Is Right films. I'm going to get you. And, for DreamWriter621, thanks for stealing my name. And my heart. And my wallet.

Posted by: Ghost Writer, Yes, The Ghost Writer. on June 10, 2003 09:33 PM

God, I hate you.

Posted by: Sisk on June 23, 2003 03:18 AM
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